What does forgiving someone do for me? There are many benefits when we forgive someone that has hurt us. Once you let go of the anger and bitterness, healing starts to take place. You don’t dwell on the person or seek getting revenge. You free yourself of focusing on someone who has hurt you. Your emotional health will return and life will open up many missed opportunities of new friendships. There will be less stress and worries in your life. Once you let go and forgive the person who hurt you then, if you have been dealing with depression, you will start to see life differently and embrace new experiences. Remember, forgiveness is an act on your part. It’s making a change from being a victim to gaining your freedom and moving on. I know some people who are known for the way they handled their separation and divorce who let their actions define who they were within their circle of friends and co-workers. Is that what you want? People will avoid you at all costs. Make a choice to forgive and move on.
So you know you should forgive the person who hurt you, but what if you can’t or don’t want to? That, my friend, is your decision. In that case, and it’s only my opinion, that person still controls you emotionally and holds the cards on how you feel about certain people. Is that what you want? I doubt it. So the benefit of letting go means you regain control of your life and move on.
I know that it’s hard to let go especially when justice has not been served. Case in point, I have a close friend whose sister and brother in-law were sitting at a stop light on their motorcycle waiting for the light to change. They were rear ended by a driver of a pickup truck who didn’t see them. His sister died on the operating table from massive trauma and his brother in-law was in ICU for weeks and is now learning how to walk again. Needless to say my friend was demanding answers from the local officials and sheriff’s office. He wasn’t getting answers and was extremely bitter about the accident and her death. For weeks, I listened to him share his anger each time we talked. I saw the un-forgiveness taking place in his heart. I decided it was about time I shared with him my experience of anger, bitterness and unforgiveness and how I dealt with it.
“Forgiveness is really just another word for freedom.”
“Sometimes a person needs to hear you forgive them so they can start to forgive themselves.”
Are you harboring unforgiveness and want to get rid of the heaviness it causes you? Do you have someone you need to forgive and just can’t let it go? Do you need to seek forgiveness and need to know how and when? Do you want to mend a relationship with a friend or family member and have hard feelings that you’ve been carrying for some time? If you answered yes to any of these questions give me a call at 303.456.0555
Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Life Coaching and Counseling Services. His services are affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your own home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype. The convenience of this type of coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching and counseling for those who live out of the Denver-metro area. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!
It’s actually a relief when we forgive others for all the mistakes and pains they caused us. Although human as we are, oftentimes, it is simply difficult to forgive. It usually takes time. Time heals all wounds as they say and when we let go of that anger and we’re ready to forgive, let’s admit it, there is somehow a certain feeling of happiness and peace within us.