Seasons of Darkness (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks
This week, we will conclude this weeks series article on “Seasons of Darkness.” I hope this series has helped those of you are dealing with everyday struggles of darkness in your lives. If you need to talk, please give me a call and let’s see what we can do to help you through your difficult times. I’m here to help!
I had a friend who went through an unwanted divorce, he fought it, begged for a second chance and said he would make all the necessary changes to save his marriage. He promised he’d be a new man. Well, that didn’t go well for him. She filed and got her divorce. He went into a season of darkness for several months. He was a pathetic and broken man. I spoke with him and asked him these questions, and maybe you can relate. I asked him if he still wanted to try to get back with his wife, and he responded, “More than ever.” Do you think living in a pity party will help you in any way get back with her, again? He said, “No.” Do you want to start changing the thought patterns that you’ve been stuck in? Do you want to be proactive in positive planning and get help in putting your plan together? Of course, I do, he said.
We sat down, and I went into what steps he needed to do to be reconciled with his wife. He had to get counseling or coaching to work on the things that he felt he owned in the marriage problems, thus causing her to want a divorce. I told him that this wasn’t a guarantee that she would even consider giving him a second chance, even if he made all the changes she wanted before the divorce. He still had to work on himself and make changes in his behaviors towards his ex-wife and kids. He knew he had to do that! His whole attitude changed when he realized the ball was in his court, he became more positive, and he started to come out of his funk. He was taking control of his life again; that was something he knew he gave up while he was in his seasons of darkness.
We all go through these times; it’s just a matter on how we deal with these tough times. Some people just hunker down and do nothing, while others become angry and forget that they do have options and fail to realize that! Trust me, you do have options to move out of the seasons of darkness. Here are some of my tips to help you put those dark clouds behind you;
- Look at and identify the reasons you’re in a season of darkness.
- What caused you to to feel this way
- Have you forgiven the person or persons who made you feel the way you do?
- Do you need help in getting on with your life and don’t know how?
- Is your darkness brought on by a bad relationship? If it is, get that person out of your life. Not every relationship is supposed to work. Realize that!
- Put together a plan with a counselor or coach, and work the plan. Have an accountability partner you can talk to.
In closing, these are just a few suggestions, I’d like you to try, they do work. Try them, you’ll see that looking at your future will give you the hope that you need and want, try to not focus on your failures. Looking back gets you nothing but troubles. Living in the present is a constant reminder of the darkness that you live in.
Do you feel frustrated about living in your seasons of darkness and need help in identifying what they are and the causes? Do you have a spouse or partner who isn’t communicating their seasons of darkness with you? Do you want help in learning good coping skills during your seasons of darkness? Are you needing help in moving on with your life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878 if you need to talk.
Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous, and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at firstname.lastname@example.org to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!