The Final Goodbye (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on November 3, 2017 by drbrooks

The Final Goodbye (3)  By Dr. Michael Brooks

Hopefully, you’re seeing the difference you can make in others lives by simply listening to their story. As we continue on with this story, when meeting perfect strangers learn how they impact our everyday lives by being a good listener.

She seemed perfectly OK with leaving this world for a better place. I can imagine the pain she was in and how the family was hurting as well. I told her that I’m just a phone call away and will be there for her, told her that I loved her and was so thankful for her being my friend. We spoke for about two minutes, and then I asked her to put Joe on the phone.  I asked Joe if she needed someone to pray for her, then call me, and put the phone up to her ear, and I’d pray with her over the phone. He agreed, and we both wept as we said goodbye.

My friend loved her family until the end

You never know who will be encouraged by a kind word you say, or a meeting with a stranger that has uplifting words for you. I have had many meetings with strangers and not accidental meetings, but Divine appointments with people in need. How this meeting with a woman flying from Fort Myers to Kansas City will forever change my life. She needed someone on this flight to help encourage her with a dreaded disease that was facing her. I know a lot of people who wouldn’t have struck up a conversation with this woman, they probably would have read their magazine, read a book or worked on their laptop missing a real opportunity of just listening to someone in need. I know some people we sit by on a plane are high maintenance and just talk to be heard. It takes someone with a heart for people to be a good listener.

On my final leg from Kansas City to Denver, I had an older gentleman probably in his mid-70’s sitting next to me. He was quiet at first. He looked at me and asked where my final journey was, and I told him Denver. He was flying on to Montana to see his daughter and grand-kids. He hadn’t seen them since his divorce a few year earlier. He wanted to spend more time with them, but because his divorce was a bitter one and expensive one at that, he didn’t have the funds to make the trip very often.

He then went into great detail about his unwanted divorce and how painful it was for him, his adult children and grand-kids. I can imagine I said, it must be hard. He said that he was retired and needed to see all his kids. I just listened to him share his personal story, that’s all he wanted is someone to hear what he had to say. Again, just listening is key to many hurting people, they don’t need advice, just your listening ear. He talked about his divorce and why he thought it happened and didn’t understand why his wife of 50 years just walked away. I know there are two sides to every story, I just heard his. I could tell he was feeling better just talking about it with a total stranger. Again, my suggestion is to be a good listener and make no judgments about their pain or story they share with you. You’ll soon realize how much better your life is after hearing their story and appreciate where you’re at in your life.

Next week we will conclude the story of “The Final Goodbye.” I talk about how you can make a difference in everyday people’s lives. I also will challenge you to make that happen for the lonely people you know in your family and community.

Do you feel it’s hard to reach out to someone who is lonely? Are you lonely and want someone to reach out to you and you’re not sure how to make that happen? Would you like to find a core group of friends to do things within a safe setting? Have you experienced loneliness and want to help others who struggle with being alone? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow loneliness to control the new experiences that you can enjoy today.

Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times of loneliness.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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The Final Goodbye (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on October 27, 2017 by drbrooks

The Final Goodbye (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week my story continues about a new friend facing serious health issues, in fact, life-threatening issues. Read about her courage and how she moves past the initial diagnosis she received in Fort Myers, Florida.

My friend asked for her friends to pray for her.

She then asked me about my story and what I did for a living, my family, and children. I was more than happy to tell her about me and who I was. She listened as I whispered into her ear. She smiled as I told her about my dreams, goals and how I loved helping people. I painted a word picture for my new friend by describing where I lived in the mountains. I told her how beautiful the rock formation behind our house was. The gray boulders that towered into the Colorado blue skies, mixed in with the boulders were green, orange and yellow moss. How the aspen leaves in the fall have brilliant yellows and reds that would dance in the gentle blowing winds. The incredible smells of aspen leaves laying on the ground. I said in the distance; you could see the snow-capped Rocky Mountains. This brought a smile to her face as I painted that picture for her with my words.

She leaned her head on my shoulder and then looked up; She was hurting I could tell by her facial expression. I asked her, “can I pray for you right now?” Normally I wouldn’t be so bold on a Southwest flight, but after talking with her, I knew we had a kindred spirit. She said “yes Please” so I put my arm around her shoulder and head to head we prayed at 37,000 Feet over Missouri.

As we descended into Kansas City, her spirits seem to perk up; she was ready to meet with her doctors and start getting the treatment she needed. She was fired up, and with a new vigor, I hadn’t seen during the entire time we talked during our flight. As we taxied towards gate, 24, She leaned over and looked at me straight in the eyes and said: “you’re the angel that God sent to me to encourage me through this.” Thank you so much, she said. I would like to keep in contact with you, can we exchange phone numbers, email addresses, and be friends on Facebook? I said, of course, we can, I would love that! With that said we wrote down our information and passed it to each other.

When the flight attendant said it was OK to get up and open the overhead luggage compartments and deboard, my new friend got up as I did, and we hugged each other and said our goodbyes. She looked at me, and before she turned away and headed out the plane and said thank you for your prayers and being there for me. Since then we have become good friends. She asks for my prayers, and I check in with her time to time just to see how she’s doing.

Then yesterday the text came from her phone, “Mike this Joe, my mom’s in the hospital and not doing very well, she would like to talk with you. She’s been here a week, and it’s bad. Can you please call as soon as you can?” I called as when I was done with a meeting I was attending. Joe answered the phone and told me that his mom was going into hospice that afternoon. Her one remaining kidney was failing, and the doctors said she was declining rapidly. He put my friend on the phone, and the first words out of her mouth in a whispered voice was “Mike, I’m getting a new body, I will see Jesus real soon.” She said that her one remaining kidney is shutting down, and she doesn’t have a lot of time left.

My friend is facing the end and getting ready for a new adventure that we eventually all will face. She is strong in her faith and ready to move on. She is in so much pain now, “I’m ready she said!”

Do you feel it’s hard to reach out to someone who is lonely? Are you lonely and want someone to reach out to you and you’re not sure how to make that happen? Would you like to find a core group of friends to do things within a safe setting? Have you experienced loneliness and want to help others who struggle with being alone? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow loneliness to control the new experiences that you can enjoy today.

Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times of loneliness.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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The Final Goodbye (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on October 11, 2017 by drbrooks

The Final Goodbye (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

How do you say goodbye to a dear friend you’ve only known for a year and a half? My story begins after visiting my brother in Florida; I wanted this to be a short trip just to check in and see how he was getting along. This story is an amazing story of a woman who is facing health issues that are life and death. Saying goodbye isn’t easy, as you’ll see.

I checked my phone for any messages or texts I received during a break from talking with some friends. I looked and saw the number from my dear friend whom I met on my return flight from Fort Myers back to Denver. I remember watching passengers walk past my seat wondering who my seatmates would be in the two seats next to me. Finally, a woman and her son looked at the seating numbers on their ticket and said they’d be seated next to me. Her son jokingly said that his mom was a talker, and watch out. We checked our seatbelts and got settled into our seats. As we sat waiting for our take off to Kansas City my seatmate and I started to get to know each other. She shared with me that she often stayed in Fort Myers during the winter months and her son, who was also sitting next to her, had to bring her home because of some medical issues she was having. As we spoke, my heart went out to this woman. She teared up as she shared her story about heading home sooner than she planned.

She said that she was having all kinds of lower back pain and went to see a doctor about the pain in Fort Myers. He ordered her an MRI and some other tests. When the doctor looked at her results, he suggested that she immediately go back home and see her own doctors. She needed more extensive blood tests, a Pet scan, and other tests to determine what was going on. They had found a mass on her right kidney in Fort Myers, and so she was heading home to see her doctors in Kansas City for a complete diagnosis and treatment plan. And that’s how we met.

She softly whispered into my ear as she spoke, the jet engines were loud and that’s the only way I could hear her. She began to open up about her personal life and how proud she was of her children and grandchildren. How successful her sons had become and about their education and the jobs they now had. She would pause to reflect on her family and then continue sharing about her life and the things she had accomplished. Then she talked about her failures in marriage and the regrets of past relationships. The flight was about two hours and thirty minutes. I listened as she talked about her life story and how her faith in God kept her going throughout this whole ordeal. I can honestly say that she was amazing to talk to and get to know.

Next week you will see the strength of my friend as she was facing her health issues. Meanwhile, think about those who can use an encouraging word from you. Who are they and where are they?

Do you feel it’s hard to reach out to someone who is lonely? Are you lonely and want someone to reach out to you and you’re not sure how to make that happen? Would you like to find a core group of friends to do things with in a safe setting? Have you experienced loneliness and want to help others who struggle with being alone? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow loneliness to control the new experiences that you can enjoy today.

Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times of loneliness.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and Life Coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and remain in the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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Be Kind To One Another (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on October 3, 2017 by drbrooks

Be Kind To One Another (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Continuing with this weeks article, I want to remind you that treating others with kindness goes a long way in enriching their lives as well as yours.

Being kind to one another should be natural.

I remember as a kid I was always trying to help others. It was in my blood, and I didn’t mind at all. I’ve seen this in some kids today; they are willing to lend a hand even when not asked. I to this day will offer to help people, opening doors, letting people go ahead of me when in the grocery line if they have a few items that they are buying. Letting people into traffic when they merge. Being kind should be in our DNA, I see less and less of it today.

Kindness is something we all should strive for, it’s rather simple, and there is no reason why you can’t extend being nice to everyone you meet. As you know, I’m a people watcher and observe people’s actions. I like to see how they interact with each other. I look at facial expressions, smiles or growls. I listen to their tone of voice and how people respond to them.

I was at a hardware store last week, and I like to joke around with the clerk, she’s a great communicator and loves the people who come into her store. We were laughing at each other while this stranger stared at us. I smiled at him, and he frowned at both of us. There was no facial expression when the man checked out of the hardware store and out he went. Kindness can be a smile, a friendly nod, a kind word. Practice being kind to people you meet. It goes a long way these days. Put a smile on someone else’s face today.

Do you feel kindness is hard to see because of someone hurt you in the past? Have you experienced cruel people in your life and want to enjoy life again but don’t know how? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow unkind people to destroy your outlook on life. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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Being Kind to One Another By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on September 25, 2017 by drbrooks

Be Kind To One Another (1)

By Dr. Michael Brooks

I was at a mall a few days ago, and as you know I like to observe people when walking through food courts. On this day, I sat down and was texting like so many of us do and overheard a man and woman arguing over which cell phone she wanted to get. He called her stupid, and that she didn’t need such an elaborate phone because she’d never figure out how to use it. She said that she would learn how to use it and she didn’t like the phone she had because it was five years old. This went back and forth for several minutes. Finally, she got up, took her cell phone shook it in his face and stormed off.

Being kind to each other requires putting the other person first.

The words he used on her were uncalled for and said out of anger. I know people struggle with issues going on in their life, we all do at one time or another. I see and hear things that are done out of frustration and knee jerk reaction. I encourage you if you’re having a tough day, don’t take it out on other people. Try to manage how you feel and deal with the issue personally and not take it out on someone who has no clue what you’re going through.

Kindness is an act you do for others. We rarely see that in the world we live in today. Many are selfish and really care about their own needs. We are taught to fight to get to the top no matter how we get there. Growing up for many of us old timers, we were told that we should treat others as we treat ourselves. I think as we observe people we don’t see that much these days.

Kindness comes in all kinds of forms, here is my list of different acts of kindness:

  • Opening doors for others.
  • Allowing people to cut in traffic when merging.
  • Complementing others for things they either do for you or others.
  • Send cookies or a card to someone who is struggling
  • Help the elderly with shopping or doing yard work
  • Thank a military individual, police officer, or firefighter for their service
  • Cheer up a loved one who is struggling with a gift or spending time with them.
  • Call someone out of the blue that you haven’t talked to in a while.
  • Offer to go shopping for someone who is homebound

This list could go on forever, think of some ways to be kind to someone in need or make it a habit just to reach out and be an encourager.

Next week we will continue with this article, remember practice kindness this week.

Do you feel kindness is hard to see because of someone hurt you in the past? Have you experienced cruel people in your life and want to enjoy life again but don’t know how? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow unkind people to destroy your outlook on life. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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When Your Marriage Seems Hopeless (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on August 22, 2017 by drbrooks

When Your Marriage Seems Hopeless (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week we will go over the importance of needing to confront your spouse with the problems in your marriage. For some people, it’s difficult to go to your spouse when you know there are some serious problems you both are facing. I’m telling you, these problems will not go away until you talk about them. This is not the time to bury your head in the sand and hope the problem goes away.

Divorce is hard on the entire family

So here are my thoughts on when to sit down and have that face to face talk. I suggest not over a text, not in an email or on the phone. If at all possible this needs to be done eyeball to eyeball. Don’t wimp out and take the easy way out. Be sincere when talking, and not shouting at each other. You’ll never get anywhere with that type of arrangement.

Have an emergency talk when infidelity has been discovered, when drugs or alcohol are becoming a big problem. Physical abuse, or pornography is an issue. These usually are the big ones that need immediate attention. I said you must learn to forgive and understand that trust takes time to be built up. Behavioral changes must take place, and it begins with strong communication and identifying what the issues are.

If you want to salvage your marriage, there will be a lot of hard work ahead of you. Plan on rolling up your sleeves and doing some hard work. The payoff is substantial, to say the least. Hard work is worth the effort and will save the heart aches that go along with divorce and separation. Don’t take working on your relationship lightly. Both have to give 100% equally. People who walk away from trying to figure out why they are having marriage problems, often kick themselves for not making an effort to restore their relationship. Regrets are many, and the memories will haunt you a lifetime if you don’t give it one last shot.

Do you feel hopeless about your marriage? Have you given up and feel there is no way your marriage can be saved? Do you want to save your marriage but don’t know what your next steps are? Do you want to improve your communication and need help in restoring it? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow hopelessness to destroy your relationship. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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When Your Marriage Seems Hopeless (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on August 17, 2017 by drbrooks

When Your Marriage Seems Hopeless (1) By Dr. Michael Brooks

As I listened to a caller on my cell phone describe the state of her marriage, I could hear the anguish in her voice. She was in deep distress in where her marriage was headed. She needed some tools on how to talk with her husband, how to communicate better and hear his needs and share hers and her concerns. This couple was not connecting whatsoever. This frustrated her to no end. She loved him and admitted her faults to him and wanted a fresh start in their relationship. He wasn’t so sure that’s what he wanted. There was a great deal of pain on his part from his past relationships, and now he was comparing her to old girlfriends. This is not a place where couples want to go. It’s easy to get caught up with this kind of thinking. But, it’s also poisonous thinking and a killer of borderline marriages in crisis.

Communication is critical in your marriage

When our marriages seem hopeless, we seem to struggle with finding ourselves and finding answers to our problems. It’s not easy being in a tight spot, and sometimes we say and do things that we don’t even understand. Hopelessness is a very strong word, and for many, it is a word that describes the situation their in. I often tell people if you’re in that spot, it’s best to step back and evaluate and take some time to let things set in and then make your next move. I believe in the realm of marriage relationships nothing is hopeless; some wise choices must be made. Whether moving on or sticking it out and working on your relationship, that is your choice.

I had a man come to my office and share his concerns about his marriage. He mentioned that he saw nothing but divorce in his future. His wife was always angry and they rarely communicated with each other. He hated going home, and I later found out she didn’t want him coming home. What a miserable existence they both lived in. We talked, and I gave him some idea’s on how to better communicate and how to become a better listener. Both felt that these were common problems in their marriage. I told him nothing is hopeless as long as you both can come to the table and talk. Learn about each other’s needs and wants. Learn to be able to share details and connect at a deeper level. Keep away from surface talks I told him, get to the point but be compassionate when you talk. Avoid blaming each other for past mistakes. Look to your future together and move in that direction. Avoid the pitfalls of bunny trailing in your conversations. Stay on topic. Unpleasant conversations can be hard but must be dealt with immediately if there is any chance of saving a relationship. What kinds of situations are called for immediate talks? Next week we will continue part two in this series.

Do you feel hopeless about your marriage? Have you given up and feel there is no way your marriage can be saved? Do you want to save your marriage but don’t know what your next steps are? Do you want to improve your communication and need help in restoring it? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow hopelessness to destroy your relationship. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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It’s not the end of believing, just a change of how we believe. By Candaise Young BCLC

Posted on August 7, 2017 by drbrooks

It’s not the end of believing, just a change of how we believe.

By Candaise Young: BCLC

My daughter came up to me after dinner struggling with tears trying to explain to me that she no longer believes in the tooth fairy. Through her streaming tears, she asks me to save her tooth for her. When I asked why she wanted me to save her tooth, she said in a frustrated, broken heart tone, “I know all of my baby teeth have been thrown away in the trash”.

We have been waiting months for one of her baby teeth to LET GO and fall out. The adult tooth had already pushed through above the baby tooth worrying us that it would misalign her other teeth. She would never let me try to pull it out. She would say, “oh no mommy it hurts too much”. I gave her the option to keep wiggling it every day and pull it out herself. That didn’t work well for her either. I finally decided it was time to make a dentist appointment to have it extracted.

Would you believe it! The very day I made an appointment to see the dentist the tooth falls out that evening?! We had corn on the cob for dinner, and it fell out.

As she stood there in her room with misty eyes, palm out holding the tiny tooth she asked me if I believed in the tooth fairy. I could see how she desperately wanted to hold onto the magic of the tooth fairy so I explained to her what I believe in.

I started by saying, “My sweet girl, it’s okay to believe in the unbelievable.  I believe the love and joy from Santa Claus is real. Every year people change for a few weeks showing more kindness, smiling more, and sharing more with each other – families coming together. During this time there is more colors, lights, and music that flow around our mundane days with joyful melodies.  The Lockness monster is another mysterious thing in the world that I have not seen but believe is possible. Lepercons, who is to say, that once upon a time there were these magical creatures living in a wondrous lush forest, or perhaps running through the green hilly moors of Ireland?  I also like to believe there were Dragons. Art throughout world history shows depictions of these mystical long winged creatures.

What matters is keeping the joy of these magical, unexplainable events/beliefs alive in your heart. So it is not the end of something you love, just a change of how you think about it”.

Suddenly, I was struck by my own words. I had been struggling desperately with my impending divorce, lack of employment, where were we going to live and how I am going to raise two small children on my own. Constant fear is what I have known this past two years. The fear of the unknown, and that everything I know will be “ENDING.”

I thought to myself, does the word “end” have to mean a terrible thing? So I looked it up and found the definition was not very comforting.

Cambridge Dictionary: ending noun [ C ] US /?en·d??/

the last part of a process, esp. the way in which something stops existing

My Life Coach helped me to see that an “end” to something is not a bad thing. He asked me to draw a circle. Inside the circle, I was to write out all the feelings I had during my marriage. Words that filled the circle were: fear, pain, anger, neglect, frustration, sorrow, longing for acceptance and stress…to name a few. Then he instructed me to draw another circle and move all the words that applied to me since my separation. To my amazement, I only moved over a few of the negative words. I was astounded by what I saw and the realization that the “end” of something can be a healthy thing to experience. I just have to start thinking about it differently.

So to answer your question, my sweet daughter… It’s not the end of believing, just a change of how we believe. I do believe in the tooth fairy, and I hope you always believe in the unbelievable.

Do you find yourself afraid to end a relationship, quit a job, or move on with your life? Are you avoiding making changes for you or your family? Are you having a hard time accepting some people for who they are?

Have you been unable to make wise decisions and have regrets? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Professional Life Coach Candaise at Applicable Counseling and Coaching services and set up an appointment 303.880.9878.

Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services provides services for those who need counseling and life coaching in relationships, businesses, and family. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Coach Candaise over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Candaise send her an email at candaisesheets@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Candaise a call! You’ll be glad you did!

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Gossip, The Divider Of Friends (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on July 31, 2017 by drbrooks

Gossip, the divider of Friends (3) By Dr. Michael Brooks

In closing, I have to say I learned a valuable lesson that day with Dolly, it’s hard to stop the person who started the gossip, but the one who shares gossip with you that’s a different story. If someone comes up to you and starts to say something about someone to you, stop them in their tracks. I tell them that I am uncomfortable with what they are sharing and suggest that we change the subject. If they continue to gossip, then I’ll say let’s go to that person you’re talking about and ask them if what is being shared is truthful. Well, my friends that will usually put a stop to gossip on the spot. The person who feels at liberty to gossip will probably never gossip top you again. Keep this in mind, if someone comes to gossip about some, you can count on them gossiping about you. Gossips have no boundaries. I have used this example about gossip when I speak to groups and individuals. You might want to use this when you are tempted to talk about someone or hear a gossip sharing with you.

A helpful acronym that you can use when wondering if you should spread a certain piece of information is T.H.I.N.K. Ask yourself the following questions:

T – Is it true? In other words, this thing that you have heard about someone else, is this accurate information? Or is it just gossip or something someone heard about someone else.

Have you ever had anyone tell a lie about you? How did that make you feel?

How about someone gossiping about you? The very word “gossip” just hisses. Gosssssssip! Remember, Satan is the Father of lies.

We are far too ready to pass on information before verifying if it is true or not.

H-Is it Helpful? Will sharing this information be helpful to the other person?

I- Is it Inspiring? That is clear enough.

N- Is it Necessary? Do we really need to spread this information?

K– Is it Kind? Pretty clear there.

You might say, “Mike, if I applied that T.H.I.N.K. acronym to what I said about others, I would hardly speak at all!” Ah! Perhaps that’s not such a bad idea?

With social media, it’s even easier to spread gossip. The gossip business brings in about 3 Billion every year, just go to the grocery store, and while you’re waiting in line to buy your groceries, you will see all kinds of gossip magazines by the checkout area. I will watch people pick up the magazine and browse through the different articles. I have even done that myself, ashamed to say.

If you’re tempted to gossip, think of the consequences and the impact that you could cause someone. We’re all guilty of gossip in the past, I think it’s time to stand up to the gossips in our lives, or if we are guilty of gossip take a second look and see the potential damage we can cause our family and friends. It’s not worth it.

Do you suspect that you’re becoming a gossip? Have you been wounded by a gossip and are hurting from it? Do you want to confront someone who has gossiped about you? Do you need to go to someone you gossiped about and make things right between you and the other person? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow an old love to destroy your relationship. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

Dr. Michael Brooks is the founder of Applicable Counseling and life coaching Services. It is affordable, accessible, anonymous and available by appointment from the privacy of your home. To avoid travel time and the comfort of home, many clients prefer to meet with Dr. Mike over the phone or via Skype (if you want to Skype with Dr. Mike send him an email at mbrooks3353@gmail.com to set up an appointment). The convenience of this type of Counseling/Coaching is the most effective means of Life Coaching for those who live outside of Colorado. Give Dr. Mike a call! You’ll be glad you did!

 

Posted in Divorce Coach, I want to save my marriage, Life in general, relationships | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment

Gossip, The Divider of Friends (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

Posted on July 24, 2017 by drbrooks

Gossip, the Divider of Friends (2) By Dr. Michael Brooks

This week we will continue with: what to do about the gossips in your life. Remember gossips in all relationships are bad, there is no excuse for them. How many people have you known going through a divorce had gossip associated with it? You heard the juicy details blow by blow, the fighting, who filed and why. Some people start adding their own details and making up outright lies about one of the people involved in the divorce. The accusations, the personal insults are spread like wildfires.

Gossip, will distroy family and friends relationships, and marriages.

Case in point, and this actually happened to me. I was working at a shipping company as a part-time employee while attending college. My soon to be ex moved out of our house to figure things out. It was a friendly agreement between us both and extremely civil for the sake of our daughter. A week after that happened I had a co-worker come up to me and ask me “why did I kick my wife out of the house?” I asked him, “who told you that?” He said, “Dolly did.” I knew Dolly as the town gossip. Then at our fifteen minute break-time, another co-worker came up to me and asked the very same question. “Why did I kick your wife out of the house?” I said under my breath, let me guess, Dolly told you that, right? He said “yes, how did you know?” I knew the town gossip was busy at work trying to stir up trouble. I knew what I had to do when I got off of work and back from my classes. I wasn’t looking forward to making that call.

I got back from my classes and thought as I drove back how to confront this woman. I was pretty upset and knew she was hitting her circle of friends with gossip about myself and wife. I walked in the door went to the phone and made the call. She answered the phone, and I confronted her. She didn’t deny the fact that she was gossiping. That made me more angrier. I asked her why she would say outright lies without talking to either one of us and getting the facts. Her comeback was outrageous. “I’ve heard bits and pieces about you both and others have shared with me things they know, I’ve got the story straight so don’t call me again. I asked my wife if she would come over and we both would make a call to Dolly and set her straight. She agreed to, and we made that call. My wife told her the facts, and I did as well. Do you think that stopped her, not on your life? She used what we said to twist the story of a divorce into a gossip tabloid for who would ever listen to her. Some people just don’t care about the lies they spread.

Next week, I will give you some advice that could change your life if followed and it will keep you out of trouble if you’re tempted to gossip about someone.

Do you suspect that you’re becoming a gossip? Have you been wounded by a gossip and are hurting from it? Do you want to confront someone who has gossiped about you? Do you need to go to someone you gossiped about and make things right between you and the other person? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you need to contact Dr. Mike and set up an appointment. Don’t allow an old love to destroy your relationship. Please call Dr. Mike at 303.880.9878. He can help you. He has helped several people going through tough times.

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